Our two children are the result of three pregnancies and one adoption. So, you can assume that there was heartbreaking loss involved, but having the privilege of being a parent is one of my greatest joys.
Although, the day our son mowed my blueberry bushes, the day he pulled up my herbs, the day he wrecked his car or the day he stopped attending community college classes, etc. are not among my fondest memories, I never regret the day we agreed to become his foster and then adoptive parents. He was five years old when he came to us. Before he entered the foster care system he had been living in a car. He had witnessed things no five-year-old should ever see.
He had severe behavioral issues, determined to be the result of his early years. Gradually he and we overcame them, a few steps forward and a few steps back. I know there are things we could have done differently, but I think that is true in raising any child. He has had many ups and downs in life, but we are very proud of the man he has become—he has a good job that he likes, a loving wife who helps him stay on track, faith and caring for others.
Our daughter was easy. We decided God thought we needed a break. Parenting her was more about building confidence, encouraging and being there for her disappointments. She didn’t want to leave our horse farm for college, but two weeks in, she was loving it. She married a wonderful guy and they are the super parents to our lovely granddaughters. She has been successful in her career and other endeavors and I can’t help but wonder if the experience of living with her brother didn’t give her inner strength. I know she sometimes wished she were an only child. She has a big heart and a strong faith that she puts into action daily.
Our children aren’t perfect, although I’ve bragged on them—that’s a mother’s prerogative. They have had very different lives and started with different handicaps and talents. But, they’ve learned how to love and how to work and I feel lucky to be their mom.